been having a few quarrels with aji lately. i dont feel like blogging about this actually, but i just want to let out my feelings somewhere.

so lately, me and aji have been arguing about this TRUSTING issue. he on the other hand, is a little too insecure of me being around without him. if u get what i mean. knowing how my everyday routine would be in school, aji would feel like i would flirt around without his knowledge. ridiculous, i know. but i dont blame him, truly. so whenever he would say things like, "less menggatal", or "dont be naughty", i would just respond back in the nicest way possible, when i was actually wondering, "why the hell is my boyfriend overprotecttive?". but he wasn't the first who would be in this towards me. so i kindda got used to it already. only that it gets really annoying when it keeps happening.

but above all, i'm just trying to take things slow. not being the temperimental me last time, but trying to be calm and easy. just hope that things would turn around soon..

went out with these 2 pals just now.

it felt so nice to be around them...sadness all pushed aside as they bring smile to my face.

freddy asked me a question that got me wondering the whole night.

"what is your greatest regret in life?"

i couldn't answer him as i thought i'm already content with where and how i am now. so i finally realized that my greatest regret would be, failing to get to Secondary 5 to take my O levels. but i wasn't sorry for that, but i was sorry the fact that was when i lost touch with my bestfriends... the girls got into sec 5 without me... they were busy preparing for their Os, and i was busy getting myself to fit in the ITE style. like what isma once told me : we've known each other for years, but i finally realized that i dont know you at all.

it hurt me at that point of time, but what she said was true. the friends i looked upon, is a whole new different people. and the friend they look upon me, is a different person as well.

then, i have a friend who questioned me, "people seemed impress with how a couple could be together for years, but have they ever thought that the couple might not know each other despite the number of years they have been together? imagine you have been together with your boyfriend for 5 years, and one day u ask him, 'just how much do you know about me?', what do you think his response would be?" i stopped and think. i couldnt answer him, cause i didnt get what he was trying to tell me. so i came to a conclusion that, though u have known that person for years, you might just come to realised, that you dont know him/her at all. cause fact is, people change...and being around that person almost everyday of your life, you dont see the change or difference in him/her..

well, i guess this is life. when u never expect things to happened, it happened. unexpected.

i'm stopping for now. a little too tired. gdnyte.