from friends to family, from family to bf, from bf to me?
i've been a little depressed lately.
this trusting thing has been going in my head every second of every day. it has been lingering in my head about some issues of past, reminiscing of things i shouldnt have said or done and how i really wish that things would be different.
having to juggle the family, and bf and school is a little hard now. pleasing is just very tiring. but sometimes, it is all i want to do. i know it is never easy to please ur parents, what more having to school and be in love? BGR problems that people face everyday is never easy to attend to. family that has little trust, thinking that things we do outside would always harm us, is just alot of headache.
having friends who think that u might just be lying to them all the time whenever u cannot do this or that, can be depressing.
i feel tight. like there's many people holding me down. it's like every step i take, eyes are looking at my eevry move.
while everyday gets tougher, expectations starts rising.
when expectations starts rising, it gives pressure a reason to come in.
i have lots to carry on my shoulder. i feel heavy all the time. the only time i feel safe is facing my computer all day, or cover myself with books in school. either way, i feel free for that short period of time. i no longer care if people thinks im problematic, or its always the same thing.
ITS MY BLOG. im free to say what i want, and what i think its right.
u have every right to condemn me, FOR ALL I CARE.
nothing else, just that.
i've been a little depressed lately.
this trusting thing has been going in my head every second of every day. it has been lingering in my head about some issues of past, reminiscing of things i shouldnt have said or done and how i really wish that things would be different.
having to juggle the family, and bf and school is a little hard now. pleasing is just very tiring. but sometimes, it is all i want to do. i know it is never easy to please ur parents, what more having to school and be in love? BGR problems that people face everyday is never easy to attend to. family that has little trust, thinking that things we do outside would always harm us, is just alot of headache.
having friends who think that u might just be lying to them all the time whenever u cannot do this or that, can be depressing.
i feel tight. like there's many people holding me down. it's like every step i take, eyes are looking at my eevry move.
while everyday gets tougher, expectations starts rising.
when expectations starts rising, it gives pressure a reason to come in.
i have lots to carry on my shoulder. i feel heavy all the time. the only time i feel safe is facing my computer all day, or cover myself with books in school. either way, i feel free for that short period of time. i no longer care if people thinks im problematic, or its always the same thing.
ITS MY BLOG. im free to say what i want, and what i think its right.
u have every right to condemn me, FOR ALL I CARE.
nothing else, just that.